Gender: A Wider Lens
Gender: A Wider Lens
23 - Sasha & Stella Answer Your Questions

23 - Sasha & Stella Answer Your Questions

In today’s episode, we begin to answer some of the many questions sent to us by listeners.

Can we be born in the wrong body? Do parental role models influence children to reject or seek transition? What is the impact of a trans partner on a teenagers’ sexuality? How do siblings of trans people experience these changes in the family?

Listen in to see if your question was answered and how Sasha and Stella plan to explore these topics in future episodes.


TED Talks — “Own Your Face” Happiness isn’t found in your appearance:

“My Philosophy for a Happy Life”:

My Left Foot Film:

The Crying Game:

Dr. Lisa Diamond:

Extended Notes

  • Thank you so much for sending your questions! Let’s talk!

  • Born in the wrong body? How is that different from those with disabilities?

  • What does it mean to be in the “wrong body”? Stella and Sasha discuss.

  • You cannot let yourself be defined by your disability or your abnormal face.

  • Stella asks some interesting questions about people who undergo drastic cosmetic surgery.

  • Is it the new normal to just drastically change your appearance?

  • Sasha shares interesting cosmetic surgery trends that we’re now seeing in our society.

  • How do you really know you’re born in the wrong body vs. just being unhappy with your body?

  • Next question! This listener’s teenage daughter is dating a girl that identifies as a boy. This mother has some questions on what this all means.

  • This listener is curious if her parenting style has had an impact on her daughter’s rebellious tendencies to reject her own gender identity.

  • It’s normal for a daughter to not be a carbon copy of the mother.

  • Don’t blame yourself for your daughter’s gender identity.

  • Parents often put their own needs on the backburner when they have a child.

  • Next question: How do you talk to siblings about their gender dysphoria?

  • Birth order is important. Was the child who is transitioning older or younger? This can affect siblings differently.

  • Parents are trying so hard to give their resources to their trans child, but siblings are sitting on the sidelines keeping their questions to themselves because they see how much conflict this is giving everyone.

  • Listeners share some of their favorite episodes, and even ones they’ve shared with their children.

  • Sasha and Stella share some upcoming episodes that they have in the works right now!

This podcast is partially sponsored by ReIME, Rethink Identity Medicine Ethics:

Learn more about our show:

Gender: A Wider Lens
Gender: A Wider Lens
In this podcast, now in its fourth year, therapists Stella O'Malley and Sasha Ayad take a deep dive into the psychological and cultural forces impacting the social changes around "gender." Through interviews with researchers, doctors, therapists, parents, detransitioners, and others, Sasha and Stella's podcast is a "must listen" for anyone trying to navigate the current gender landscape. With their sharp analytical minds and deep compassionate hearts, Stella and Sasha have also become known throughout many parent networks as lighthouses in the midst of some very stormy seas. Previous guests include Helen Joyce, Jesse Singal, Leor Sapir, Kathleen Stock, Jamie Reed, Peter Boghossian and more.