Gender: A Wider Lens
Gender: A Wider Lens
145 - Things ROGD Parents Need to Hear (even if they don’t want to)

145 - Things ROGD Parents Need to Hear (even if they don’t want to)

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As therapists working almost exclusively with gender-questioning youth, Sasha and Stella share a little bit about the challenging experience of straddling between understanding the child's experiences and supporting parents who often grapple with goals conflicting with those of the child.  This episode aims to provide valuable insights for parents navigating the complexities of supporting gender-diverse children with the goal of exploring some critical considerations that can sometimes be difficult for parents to embrace. They caution against oversimplified narratives, especially for parents who may have adopted a singular explanation for their child's trans identity, and they stress the importance of broadening perspectives, encouraging parents to consider multiple angles, including family dynamics. While exploring these key ideas, Sasha & Stella underscore the need for a middle ground, where parents provide warmth, connection, and engagement while remaining cautious about external influences, reminding parents that solutions lie in embracing complexity rather than adopting extreme and narrow approaches. 

  • Excessive tech restrictions and controlling behavior without warmth can be counterproductive in dealing with ROGD

  • Be flexible and open to embracing radical changes in parenting strategies

  • Avoid the assumption that sharing extensive medical information about gender dysphoria will necessarily be helpful

  • Seek a wider understanding, thoughtfully embrace the possibility it might not be ROGD

  • Parents cannot dictate or control the therapeutic decisions made by their child’s therapist

  • Seek and pursue a measured and supportive approach, be cautious about rushing or hastily implementing various interventions to “fix” the situation

  • Parents need to manage their own distress before attempting to effectively help their child, prioritizing self-care is a must

  • Avoid and recognize the unhelpful nature of engaging in confrontations (specifically online) with kids, detransitions, or activists

  • Reassess roles and emotions when considering long-term transition strategies, reflecting on the possibility that (in some cases) transitioning may be a viable long-term experience

If you liked this episode, more episodes you might find interesting:

Episode 2 - Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria

Episode 4 - Why Do People Seek a New Identity? 

Episode 44 - Multiple Meanings of Gender Dysphoria: A Conversation with Aaron Terrell 

Episode 52 - Gender Dysphoria & Detransition Research: A Conversation W/ Dr. Lisa Littman 

Episode 122 - We Wrote a Book: When Kids Say They're Trans | A Guide for Thoughtful Parents

Episode 136 - Gender as a Communication, It's Not What You Think with Maggie Goldsmith 

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Gender: A Wider Lens
Gender: A Wider Lens
In this podcast, now in its fourth year, therapists Stella O'Malley and Sasha Ayad take a deep dive into the psychological and cultural forces impacting the social changes around "gender." Through interviews with researchers, doctors, therapists, parents, detransitioners, and others, Sasha and Stella's podcast is a "must listen" for anyone trying to navigate the current gender landscape. With their sharp analytical minds and deep compassionate hearts, Stella and Sasha have also become known throughout many parent networks as lighthouses in the midst of some very stormy seas. Previous guests include Helen Joyce, Jesse Singal, Leor Sapir, Kathleen Stock, Jamie Reed, Peter Boghossian and more.