My daughter is just a girl who has a diverse mix of interests. I wouldn’t even call it gender nonconformity, others might. When she at the cusp of turning 14 she told me that she didn’t feel like a girl. My husband and I did not allow her or the school to change name/pronouns. She visibly relaxed when we told her this. 18 months on she is still very much an ally to her trans and non binary friends but she knows that she’s a girl and appears to be comfortable with that. She attends a girls school and one of the reasons we chose it was so that she would be free to choose whichever subjects she liked and not feel as though she was picking a boys subject or subjects steered towards girls. I was just like her. As a kid I spent half of my free time climbing trees, searching for owl pellets and animal bones, cycling around the village and visiting the farms to stroke the cows and the other half doing ballet lessons. I eventually went on to ballet school and became a dancer but I could just as happily have become an archaeologist or forensic anthropologist (I’m tempted, even now, to study towards that). Why are things, nowadays, held so tightly to masculine or feminine boxes? And why do kids have to pick their box and squeeze into it? I see biological sex as the thing that grounds you, not in a restrictive way but in a way that sets you free.
As a parent of a female college student on T and as an adolescent NP, I see both as correct. The discomfort with the physical and social changes of adolescence is a “push” towards looking for an explanation/solution. Social media provides lots of explanations to try on: autism, adhd, anxiety, gender dysphoria. (Teens are self diagnosing with all these things based on TikTok videos). The breadth of the transgender umbrella makes it easy to settle on that explanation, and it comes with a promised solution. Kind of a “pull” into identifying as trans.
According to Human Rights Campaign, the term “transgender” now includes “people who describe themselves as transsexual, cross-dressers, or OTHERWISE GENDER NON-CONFORMING.” (emphasis mine)
Edited to add: I just saw Puzzle Therapy’s comment and I do agree that this expanded definition might not be the main cause of higher rates of trans-identifying. Still, I find it worth pointing out, as yet another instance of the language games being played.
I definitely think this trans umbrella concept and the redefining of "transgender" in the various schools and organizational glossaries is a huge contributor to what we are seeing today. 25 years ago, "trans rights" generally referred to not discriminating against a very small sliver of the population who had such severe gender dysphoria that they took great steps to "live as the opposite sex." Now that "transgender" includes cross-dressers, trans rights means any man in a dress should have access to women's spaces. When you put "intersex" under the trans umbrella, it becomes easier to conflate transgender with the idea of a "spectrum" of sex characteristics which leads people to believe sex itself is a spectrum. Including masculine women and feminine men under the "trans umbrella" severely impacts the cohort of bi or gay men and women who have been convinced that defying sex-stereotypes mean they no longer belong in their sex class. I think this has certainly contributed to the non-binary explosion. This concept also impacts greater society who has been taught or trained to believe that "gender nonconforming" equals trans. This is why people like Katie Herzog get referred to as "they" all the time (she complains about this often on BarPod), it also explains why some keep trying to trans the dead--like saying Sally Ride was non-binary, or Joan of Arc. Or those who rewrite gay history saying that "transwomen" started the Stonewall riot. When they weren't trans, they were drag queens (and they didn't start the riot) but if drag queens are now under the trans umbrella then all the men who dressed in drag for any variety of reasons since the beginning of time can be referred to as "trans women," or even literal women, if you believe trans women are women. The biggest impact I have seen is on the notion that "trans people have always existed." When people say this, MOST of them mean: "gender nonconforming people have always existed." Which is true. But, historically, gender nonconforming people were not having medical interventions or trying to change the definition of male and female. Yet by saying "trans" = "gender nonconforming" all of history can be rewritten to reinforce a modern political narrative. This is definitely not the only reason so many people (particularly girls) are going down this road. But it is a huge contributor to why they are being lumped together with people with severe dysphoria and then facilitated through social and medical transition, in my opinion.
You are right— defying sex stereotypes DOES NOT MEAN you no longer belong to your SEX class!!
And the chain of false beliefs that are implied to society by including certain words and categories under that “umbrella” is a huge factor in society’s willingness to not see the scandal taking place on our kids. The collective human mind is being brainwashed by activists, schools and doctors to change the meaning of words. Sow the chaos, create confusion and it becomes easier to just accept new definitions and look away as long as it doesn’t affect your family.
I’ve never seen this before, but I think I can understand how the whole idea of placing yourself in a special category appeals to kids. It makes them feel special, but still part of a narrow group that is part of a broader community within LGBTQ.
When I was a teenager I was into a very specific music scene and I liked identifying with the values and fashions of that music scene. It’s the same urges driving it. Being a punk or a goth is healthier though because there’s no need to cut off healthy body parts or take hormones, etc.
The short version of my thoughts: It's not the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the gender nonconformity details under the trans umbrella causing the skyrocketing numbers; it's the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the descriptions of body distress in definitions of gender dysphoria and being trans that are pulling in most girls.
The long version: I LOVED the interview with Colin, but I think he is off base on this one and gives too much explanatory power to the trans umbrella as he describes it. Perhaps it makes sense for what he sees from his perspective, but he's not a parent of a teen girl watching how this plays out with her and all her friends, nor does he work with teen girls. His explanation of girls naturally having more gender nonconforming traits -> girls see that all the trans umbrella definitions basically define *any* gender nonconformity as trans -> girls get the message they are trans and start identifying as trans doesn't match what I've seen in real life or in the many detransitioner/desister accounts I've heard. From my experience, it's NOT the vague definition of gender nonconformity that drives this. It's girls in deep distress over their changing bodies, difficulties navigating the new and complex social dynamics that are part of adolescent life, the well documented drop in self-esteem with the onset of puberty, anxieties about developing sexuality (whether same sex attracted or straight - BOTH create deep anxieties), and their deep insecurities that their (often many) feminine traits aren't good enough/pretty enough/desirable enough that drive them to ask "what's wrong with me?" and to start looking for answers in the cultural (or online) symptom pool. In my experience, it's NOT the vagueness of "gender nonconformity" that exists under the trans umbrella that pulls most teen girls in, it's the vagueness of descriptions of *any discomfort with the body* in the definitions of GENDER DYSPHORIA that snags these girls. The vague definition of trans that includes anything and everything may make it easier for the girls to pick a label to identify with under the trans umbrella, but, IMO, that's a minor secondary downstream issue, not a key piece for how adolescent girls get pulled into this at the beginning. The girls don't even need a gender umbrella with a broad definition of trans. They find a way to force themselves into whatever beliefs they have about what "trans" means.
While I'm on a soap box here...I think Colin's trans umbrella idea is possibly part of the over-focus on the "transing away the gay" and "save the tomboys" narrative that people lean hard into as a way to get democrats/liberals/leftists to feel like they can safely question child transition without being bigoted or anti-LGBT. Yes, there are definitely girls who get pulled into this because of internalized homophobia, homophobic families and communities, gender nonconformity, and confusion about being same-sex attracted. Yes, same-sex attracted girls are over-represented in the data on detransition and desistance as compared to the general population, but still a very large portion - even a sold majority in some surveys - are girls who are NOT same-sex attracted or gender non-conforming. The majority are sensitive, emotional, gender conforming, mostly if not exclusively straight girls who struggle more than the average adolescent girl with the challenges of puberty and the teen years and are looking for an explanation and a way out of their distress.
There's not a lot of sympathy for these girls and their often very challenging and messy struggles. They are the girls it's ok to roll your eyes at, call drama queens and hot messes, for YouTubers to make mocking and derogatory reaction videos about. Think about Ally Sheedy's character in The Breakfast Club. Today she would have definitely been cutting and adopting a trans identity. They're the ones who end up in hospital ERs because of suicidal ideation. Go to an adolescent psychiatrist hospital and see how many girls there are with multiple mental health diagnoses who landed there because of self-harming and who also have some sort of trans ID (also note how the staff goes along with all of it because it's easier to give these girls what they want and not argue with them as they add more psych meds during their 5-7 day acute stay). People don't really care about these girls and their very typically female struggles. Going back to Ally Sheedy's character: She had to be transformed into a "normal" girl who stopped acting weird and depressed, brush her hair and put on some makeup to be liked and accepted by the group. Her happy ending was transforming (transitioning) into a different person. None of the other teen archetype characters had to do that for their happy ending.
So while I love Colin's work on the biology of sex, I think he's off the mark with his trans umbrella theory. Yes, I'm sure there are some girls who fit this model and got into a trans identity this way, but I think they are the minority. It's not the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the gender nonconformity details under the trans umbrella causing the skyrocketing numbers; it's the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the descriptions of body distress that are pulling in most girls.
Add to that the past 10 years of hyper focus by schools and others on mental health vigilance— pathologizing normal teen angst.
And you nailed it re: when these girls are in the hospital getting what they want because it’s easier for the staff while they medicate them to an unrecognizable child. And the side effects of these meds…. Suicidal ideation. Then the kids believe they are suicidal because of lack of acceptance of Trans people and the looming transgenicide by society, all while claiming there are so many more Trans kids because of more societal acceptance.
Absolutely true. I also think that the culture has expanded as well and now, in addition to the girls you describe who fell in due to puberty struggles (mine included) you also see what Colin has identified as well. It’s like the cult has expanded and now needs to capture as many people as possible to keep it alive and society is also swept up with the tide. I think both of these ways of coming into trans are happening now. I also wonder if this new umbrella term is a way to keep our girls in the cult. My daughter seemed to be coming out of the rigidity of thinking but I’m now seeing her be very ‘bendy’ in her identity yet still call herself a guy, but a guy with a handmade crocheted purse and painted long nails. I’m pissed that society thinks this is cool because these kids still want to medicalize. My artist friend has two helpers in her studio, both women who now both have beards, wear women’s clothing but one has long hair with a female name and the other short hair with a guys name. Both have the T voice. Do people who aren’t living inside this nightmare think this is normal?
My daughter is just a girl who has a diverse mix of interests. I wouldn’t even call it gender nonconformity, others might. When she at the cusp of turning 14 she told me that she didn’t feel like a girl. My husband and I did not allow her or the school to change name/pronouns. She visibly relaxed when we told her this. 18 months on she is still very much an ally to her trans and non binary friends but she knows that she’s a girl and appears to be comfortable with that. She attends a girls school and one of the reasons we chose it was so that she would be free to choose whichever subjects she liked and not feel as though she was picking a boys subject or subjects steered towards girls. I was just like her. As a kid I spent half of my free time climbing trees, searching for owl pellets and animal bones, cycling around the village and visiting the farms to stroke the cows and the other half doing ballet lessons. I eventually went on to ballet school and became a dancer but I could just as happily have become an archaeologist or forensic anthropologist (I’m tempted, even now, to study towards that). Why are things, nowadays, held so tightly to masculine or feminine boxes? And why do kids have to pick their box and squeeze into it? I see biological sex as the thing that grounds you, not in a restrictive way but in a way that sets you free.
As a parent of a female college student on T and as an adolescent NP, I see both as correct. The discomfort with the physical and social changes of adolescence is a “push” towards looking for an explanation/solution. Social media provides lots of explanations to try on: autism, adhd, anxiety, gender dysphoria. (Teens are self diagnosing with all these things based on TikTok videos). The breadth of the transgender umbrella makes it easy to settle on that explanation, and it comes with a promised solution. Kind of a “pull” into identifying as trans.
Yep, I was amazed last fall to find this glossary entry for “transgender” on p. 26 of this HRC publication: https://assets2.hrc.org/files/assets/resources/transgender_visibility_guide_042013.pdf
According to Human Rights Campaign, the term “transgender” now includes “people who describe themselves as transsexual, cross-dressers, or OTHERWISE GENDER NON-CONFORMING.” (emphasis mine)
Edited to add: I just saw Puzzle Therapy’s comment and I do agree that this expanded definition might not be the main cause of higher rates of trans-identifying. Still, I find it worth pointing out, as yet another instance of the language games being played.
I definitely think this trans umbrella concept and the redefining of "transgender" in the various schools and organizational glossaries is a huge contributor to what we are seeing today. 25 years ago, "trans rights" generally referred to not discriminating against a very small sliver of the population who had such severe gender dysphoria that they took great steps to "live as the opposite sex." Now that "transgender" includes cross-dressers, trans rights means any man in a dress should have access to women's spaces. When you put "intersex" under the trans umbrella, it becomes easier to conflate transgender with the idea of a "spectrum" of sex characteristics which leads people to believe sex itself is a spectrum. Including masculine women and feminine men under the "trans umbrella" severely impacts the cohort of bi or gay men and women who have been convinced that defying sex-stereotypes mean they no longer belong in their sex class. I think this has certainly contributed to the non-binary explosion. This concept also impacts greater society who has been taught or trained to believe that "gender nonconforming" equals trans. This is why people like Katie Herzog get referred to as "they" all the time (she complains about this often on BarPod), it also explains why some keep trying to trans the dead--like saying Sally Ride was non-binary, or Joan of Arc. Or those who rewrite gay history saying that "transwomen" started the Stonewall riot. When they weren't trans, they were drag queens (and they didn't start the riot) but if drag queens are now under the trans umbrella then all the men who dressed in drag for any variety of reasons since the beginning of time can be referred to as "trans women," or even literal women, if you believe trans women are women. The biggest impact I have seen is on the notion that "trans people have always existed." When people say this, MOST of them mean: "gender nonconforming people have always existed." Which is true. But, historically, gender nonconforming people were not having medical interventions or trying to change the definition of male and female. Yet by saying "trans" = "gender nonconforming" all of history can be rewritten to reinforce a modern political narrative. This is definitely not the only reason so many people (particularly girls) are going down this road. But it is a huge contributor to why they are being lumped together with people with severe dysphoria and then facilitated through social and medical transition, in my opinion.
I love this. Its so thought provoking.
You are right— defying sex stereotypes DOES NOT MEAN you no longer belong to your SEX class!!
And the chain of false beliefs that are implied to society by including certain words and categories under that “umbrella” is a huge factor in society’s willingness to not see the scandal taking place on our kids. The collective human mind is being brainwashed by activists, schools and doctors to change the meaning of words. Sow the chaos, create confusion and it becomes easier to just accept new definitions and look away as long as it doesn’t affect your family.
I’ve never seen this before, but I think I can understand how the whole idea of placing yourself in a special category appeals to kids. It makes them feel special, but still part of a narrow group that is part of a broader community within LGBTQ.
When I was a teenager I was into a very specific music scene and I liked identifying with the values and fashions of that music scene. It’s the same urges driving it. Being a punk or a goth is healthier though because there’s no need to cut off healthy body parts or take hormones, etc.
The short version of my thoughts: It's not the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the gender nonconformity details under the trans umbrella causing the skyrocketing numbers; it's the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the descriptions of body distress in definitions of gender dysphoria and being trans that are pulling in most girls.
The long version: I LOVED the interview with Colin, but I think he is off base on this one and gives too much explanatory power to the trans umbrella as he describes it. Perhaps it makes sense for what he sees from his perspective, but he's not a parent of a teen girl watching how this plays out with her and all her friends, nor does he work with teen girls. His explanation of girls naturally having more gender nonconforming traits -> girls see that all the trans umbrella definitions basically define *any* gender nonconformity as trans -> girls get the message they are trans and start identifying as trans doesn't match what I've seen in real life or in the many detransitioner/desister accounts I've heard. From my experience, it's NOT the vague definition of gender nonconformity that drives this. It's girls in deep distress over their changing bodies, difficulties navigating the new and complex social dynamics that are part of adolescent life, the well documented drop in self-esteem with the onset of puberty, anxieties about developing sexuality (whether same sex attracted or straight - BOTH create deep anxieties), and their deep insecurities that their (often many) feminine traits aren't good enough/pretty enough/desirable enough that drive them to ask "what's wrong with me?" and to start looking for answers in the cultural (or online) symptom pool. In my experience, it's NOT the vagueness of "gender nonconformity" that exists under the trans umbrella that pulls most teen girls in, it's the vagueness of descriptions of *any discomfort with the body* in the definitions of GENDER DYSPHORIA that snags these girls. The vague definition of trans that includes anything and everything may make it easier for the girls to pick a label to identify with under the trans umbrella, but, IMO, that's a minor secondary downstream issue, not a key piece for how adolescent girls get pulled into this at the beginning. The girls don't even need a gender umbrella with a broad definition of trans. They find a way to force themselves into whatever beliefs they have about what "trans" means.
While I'm on a soap box here...I think Colin's trans umbrella idea is possibly part of the over-focus on the "transing away the gay" and "save the tomboys" narrative that people lean hard into as a way to get democrats/liberals/leftists to feel like they can safely question child transition without being bigoted or anti-LGBT. Yes, there are definitely girls who get pulled into this because of internalized homophobia, homophobic families and communities, gender nonconformity, and confusion about being same-sex attracted. Yes, same-sex attracted girls are over-represented in the data on detransition and desistance as compared to the general population, but still a very large portion - even a sold majority in some surveys - are girls who are NOT same-sex attracted or gender non-conforming. The majority are sensitive, emotional, gender conforming, mostly if not exclusively straight girls who struggle more than the average adolescent girl with the challenges of puberty and the teen years and are looking for an explanation and a way out of their distress.
There's not a lot of sympathy for these girls and their often very challenging and messy struggles. They are the girls it's ok to roll your eyes at, call drama queens and hot messes, for YouTubers to make mocking and derogatory reaction videos about. Think about Ally Sheedy's character in The Breakfast Club. Today she would have definitely been cutting and adopting a trans identity. They're the ones who end up in hospital ERs because of suicidal ideation. Go to an adolescent psychiatrist hospital and see how many girls there are with multiple mental health diagnoses who landed there because of self-harming and who also have some sort of trans ID (also note how the staff goes along with all of it because it's easier to give these girls what they want and not argue with them as they add more psych meds during their 5-7 day acute stay). People don't really care about these girls and their very typically female struggles. Going back to Ally Sheedy's character: She had to be transformed into a "normal" girl who stopped acting weird and depressed, brush her hair and put on some makeup to be liked and accepted by the group. Her happy ending was transforming (transitioning) into a different person. None of the other teen archetype characters had to do that for their happy ending.
So while I love Colin's work on the biology of sex, I think he's off the mark with his trans umbrella theory. Yes, I'm sure there are some girls who fit this model and got into a trans identity this way, but I think they are the minority. It's not the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the gender nonconformity details under the trans umbrella causing the skyrocketing numbers; it's the vagueness and all-inclusiveness of the descriptions of body distress that are pulling in most girls.
This is powerful.
Add to that the past 10 years of hyper focus by schools and others on mental health vigilance— pathologizing normal teen angst.
And you nailed it re: when these girls are in the hospital getting what they want because it’s easier for the staff while they medicate them to an unrecognizable child. And the side effects of these meds…. Suicidal ideation. Then the kids believe they are suicidal because of lack of acceptance of Trans people and the looming transgenicide by society, all while claiming there are so many more Trans kids because of more societal acceptance.
Absolutely true. I also think that the culture has expanded as well and now, in addition to the girls you describe who fell in due to puberty struggles (mine included) you also see what Colin has identified as well. It’s like the cult has expanded and now needs to capture as many people as possible to keep it alive and society is also swept up with the tide. I think both of these ways of coming into trans are happening now. I also wonder if this new umbrella term is a way to keep our girls in the cult. My daughter seemed to be coming out of the rigidity of thinking but I’m now seeing her be very ‘bendy’ in her identity yet still call herself a guy, but a guy with a handmade crocheted purse and painted long nails. I’m pissed that society thinks this is cool because these kids still want to medicalize. My artist friend has two helpers in her studio, both women who now both have beards, wear women’s clothing but one has long hair with a female name and the other short hair with a guys name. Both have the T voice. Do people who aren’t living inside this nightmare think this is normal?